My prior therapeutic practice consisted primarily in working with couples who desired to restore emotional intimacy, have a common goal of obtaining a deeper sense of connection, and who were willing to take risks and be vulnerable with their partner. This work consisted of coming along side individuals who longed to changed their love life and create meaningful and rewarding relationships with their partners. 

 

This work involved empathic and compassionate connecting, attuning, and meeting each individual or couple with validation of their subjective experience while viewing them through the lens of unconditional positive regard. Through warmth and gentle curiosity, I sat with clients and listened with the intent to fully understand and submerge myself into their inner world. I viewed each individual through an attachment framework, as our early attachment style to our caregivers shapes and influences how we view ourselves, choose our lovers, and interact with the world around us. 

 

As I sat with clients and heard their cries, I too was in search of healing myself, and I too was longing for a secure loving relationship with my own husband. Through my own sitting on the couch as a client and divulging in the sadness on the cushion, I realized how much I was struggling to find my way out of my own discomfort. I was constantly living in a vibration that drew in more suffering that I longed to heal from.

 

I learned about Mindfulness meditation and began the process of waking up. I’d sit down to mediate, meaning—focusing on my breath, noticing what arises within and around, letting the thoughts and sensations go, and returning back to the breath over and over again. I began to realize the magnitude of suffering I was experiencing, but wasn’t fully aware of the depth of it until I went silent. My practice of sitting was my catalyst that saved me from myself. In that space, I was able to drop the negative vibrational beliefs I had about who I was and step into the stillness, the quiet, the sacred space of the Divine. From that space, my inner wisdom began to rise and I began to see that I was not in love with ME. 

 

The more I sat, the more I realized I had deep rooted beliefs about individuals and relationships that kept me attracting the negativity, over and over again. I finally was able to see and come to terms that I was in an abusive relationship and had false ideas about marriage and love. I was ashamed about my personal life because I was on my way to become a licensed couples therapist. How embarrassing is that!?

 

I longed to feel deeply loved, and secure with my person, but I began to realize I had to feel that level of love for myself first in order to attract what I truly desired, and that is when I discovered a forgotten wisdom. This secret made it apparent to me that I was in complete control over my life and I was the only one able to change it. Life wasn’t just happening to me, I was creating all of it. I wasn’t just a victim of life, I was creating the reality that I was a victim who had no power. All because what I allowed myself to believe about ME. I attracted all the abuse because of the thoughts I kept believing. 

 

I started to see a pattern with my individual clients and with my couples as well. Their beliefs about themselves kept them in their own suffering and the thought of loving themselves was hard to grasp or even feel. If my clients fell in love with who they were and let go of the sabotaging beliefs, their suffering would exist no more. Their lives would be better and they wouldn’t have to see me. I became an advocate of meditation and self love to my individual clients and my couples. 

 

I finally hit a breaking point in my marriage and came to a crossroads of two choices, I was either going to kill myself because I couldn’t deal with my current life anymore, or truly fall madly in love with me. So I decided to do the latter. 

 

Loving myself launched my own evolution, my own rebirth, my own way out of the suffering I felt I was trapped in. This awareness of the cage I placed myself in led me to leave my abusive relationship, close down my private practice along with my pursuit to become a licensed couples therapist and pursue a deeper connection within, falling more madly in love with me and truly creating the life of my dreams by attracting my soulmate. 

 

As I continued the gradual process of loving myself, I began to realize that instead of looking at the wrong doing that was done to me, and keeping my focus on the discomfort and the justifiable reasons for my suffering, I began to see that I was limiting my own happiness and creating more and more suffering for myself. I saw that the more I talked about the suffering in my life, the more it kept coming, the more I kept those beliefs alive. The negative beliefs withheld the truth from within.

 

I recognized that the process of loving myself went hand in hand with letting go of the negative talk within and around, redirecting my attention to compassion for myself and others and what I truly wanted. Keeping my thoughts focused on what I longed to experience and only speaking and thinking of that drew that closer and closer. I began to truly understand the laws of the universe, likeness is drawn to likeness. I needed to be what I longed to experience, and I did just that.  

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My life has radically changed from the first moment I sat down on my meditation cushion. I am in love with my life and love what I have created. I have found my soulmate and have reopened my doors to working as a therapist again and also as a meditation and spiritual teacher. 

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I hope that my words speak truth to your soul and you begin the steps to honor, respect and treat yourself with kindness because you deserve it. ✨

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With Tremendous Love, 

Chelsea Brielle

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